First, we got trapped in a system; 9-3-3-6 – Go to school, go again, then just one more. Don’t drink, don’t party; be good so you can get good grades, and bag a certificate! Jobs await you if you follow the process! Scam!

Now, school is over, where are the jobs? 

“Welcome to life!” 

Hustle oo! Make you no dey beg money for motor-park!

Dear Employers, 

I hope you’ll stumble on this article and read it. Perchance, you’ll wear our shoes, and understand that the hustle is suicidal!

“We are hiring! Send Cvs to…”. 

Famous social media post of those Employers who got their seats at the table. 

Okay, good news, isn’t it? Finally, opportunity to shoot our shots. Now, we won’t ‘stay at home eating mother’s food’, while dad asks us after every devotion: “what is your plan for your life?”

I wore my best suit, then swallowed all the earfuls. Grandma said; “Answer questions well, be confident and speak like you own the company!” Na so!

I finally arrived at the venue after an hour in traffic. Well, not bad, there’s still two hours and forty minutes away to the interview. 

“You have to be punctual! Show that you are serious!” Is that not what Dad woke me up by 3:45am to say? 

I entered the interview hall, guess what? Fifteen persons were already seated, waiting for the same interview! Ohh! I thought I was early?

Fast forward. FIRST PHASE OF INTERVIEW is over. 

“We will get back to you”. Another famous response of CEOs. 

The wait began! Every morning, dad was keeping a calendar; “It’s two weeks after your interview, are you sure you did well?”

I decided to send an email. A response came while I was at my dinner.

“Sorry for the late response. The second phase of the interview holds tomorrow by 8am, be punctual. Good luck.”
Na wa! 

Dad was kind – he gave me N2,000 transport fare after a long lecture on how my mates hawk pure water. Mad o! 

Fast forward. SECOND PHASE OF INTERVIEW is over. 

“We will get back to you”. 

Wait! What’s all this “we will get back to you!” What’s stopping you from saying: “Sorry, you didn’t make it through the interview”. OR “Your skills don’t match with the roles”. OR “You haven’t convinced us enough!”

Dear Employers,

This is a muse, but the frustration is hell! Please, Applicants/Employees want the truth! Give us the feedback of our performance during your interview, and tell us what skills to improve! Recommend us to other individuals/organisations that our skills may fit. Is that too much to ask?

You sit on an Executive swing-chair, in an air-conditioned office. Then, nod your heads, feeling like you are “helping the needy”. To your office poise, add some emotional intelligence! 

Las las, I got a job; 9-5-247 – another crazy system! But na the salary worse pass! Stay in the ‘frustration’ while searching for another job! Inside life!

This article was written by Mmenyenene-Abasi Akpakpan; connect with her on Instagram via here 

23 Comments

  • Neriah says:

    Many can relate to this article… Very well writing with necessary emotion written all over it… I thought I laughed at a point even. Pls Keep writing Mmeyene

  • Ibhafidon says:

    Super engaging…I had pictures of the scenarios as I read through…great piece of work

  • Rumi says:

    Its remarkable the sad everyday truth, 9-5 24/7 in various forms and bags and sometimes we pray and beg for it.
    Thanks Mmenyenene, for this totally relatable, down to earth, beautifully written and the sad reality.

  • Abass says:

    Where is the lie here?!
    This is the system we are meant to survive through, cos if you dare to complain, they’ve been a lot of others that made it on this road, they’ll say🙄

    This is the piece!

  • This is what happens in real life. I just hope many young people can awake to the realities of life.

  • Kenney says:

    For many a young or job seeking Nigerian, this is their life experience put to writing. Your piece Mmenyene succinctly captures real life experience with the emotion, humour and real life check.

    I would to the System that for growth and increased productivity Employers would glean a thing or two from this piece.

    To the employee, in so much as you’re able, employers may never change, most aren’t that caring, you’re the one who may have to go beyond your current state to master a skill that could keep you off red alerts whilst trying to secure a decent job.

    Again, fantastic piece Mmenyene.

  • Ufuoma .G. Bezi says:

    This article was written from a sound mind. This is the reality in ink. Great one girl

  • Naomi says:

    It’s currently the lot of a friend right now so I can relate to this to an extent.The suspense that follows job interviews is enough to give anyone a nervous breakdown.I’m hoping I have an easier experience when I officially start job hunting.This makes for a great read Mmenyene!!.Kudos!

  • Annie says:

    Great piece

  • Kaymee Bassey says:

    Don’t mind the system joh! Nope most times the rejection has nothing to do with the potential employee, It has a lot to do with the failed system. Succinctly captured

  • Oreva says:

    Awesome write up as always Mmenyene, captured the reality of most job seekers and employees alike, I hope this get to the table of some employers and HR personnel. Great write up as always.

  • Akpevwe Egbelughe says:

    Well said and put together . Painful reality of many early job seekers. The only thing I did like for HR persons to do is give objective feedback on the interviewees performance during the interview process. We understand the applicants are much ,but the same time you use to pen the reasons for not moving on with a particular candidate, you might as well use to give the feedback , however terrible you think the person may have performed . Situations change , you might find yourself at the other side of the table and also need this feedback yourself….

  • Chukwuma says:

    Mmene you have everything it takes to be a great writer. I have been too busy to read this but once I started I couldn’t stop till the end. I’m super-proud of you.

    I’ll say to the Nigerian employee, welcome to adult life! Lol. You gave a sound advice to the Nigerian employer, applicants truly want the truth. But my advice to the Nigerian employer, don’t stop, just keep applying. Making sure that each time you improve on your application. Don’t apply thoughtlessly, do it with intention. It will pay off in the end.

    Cheer my fellow Nigerian employee.

  • RUTH TSEKIRI says:

    Awesome,catchy and engaging write up. I can totally relate to every single thing you mentioned here. I’m still in that condition hoping to get out soon or get something better. Only God can forgive employers with their slogan of “We will get back to you”. They don’t seem to understand that their feedback to an applicant helps the person to make improvement in his skills and knowledge where necessary in other to become better. Instead they keep u on the dark. It is well.

    • Ayodele Makun says:

      This is every reality of an aspiring fresh from school graduate degree holder in Nigeria without the aided connexions.. 🤔😔

  • Shadrach Isakhue says:

    Correct thing, lovely write up and self expression, kudos!! 👏👏

  • Machill Nwoko says:

    Well written.. I could not have written it any better…So Apt. and every day scenerio
    How I wish they could be a change especially the part of getting response after going for an interview

  • Tribe of judah says:

    Actually this is nice

  • Nyakno says:

    This article is a cornucopia of current reality. I must say that the prolific penman of this article should be commended.

  • Nasa says:

    This has to be the shortest write-up ever written by Myene, lol! At first I was scared of opening the link for fear that I may have to read 5,000 words – #NoTime. However, I was pleasantly surprised! Short, straightforward, aptly written, engaging and relatable article. Parents also need to come to the realization that the world has moved beyond the industrial age, we are in the information/knowledge era and so our career choices must be tailored to fit into this new world.
    Well done girl, you’re definitely an excellent writer.

  • Believe says:

    Very relatable sad truth
    I could actually see the scenerio Cleary. Well done Mmeyene. You are not just an amazing writer but an intelligent one too.

  • Edighe loveth says:

    Hmmmm inside life! This is the system we found ourselves.
    This short write-up said it all, well done girl, I just smiled while reading cos I can relate 😀

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