Sometime last year, I had a conversation with a friend. This conversation was one which I had written off at the time as I did not think there was any basis for this happening. This friend of mine, had expressed his displeasure at the way attention was being drawn to the female child so much so that he thought that a time would come when there would be an imbalance in the way men were allowed to voice issues that related to them. He had also gone on to say that there were a lot of issues which related to the men but nobody was listening to them because we had succeeded in painting the female as a sort of weak being needing some sort of rescue. Like I said earlier, I did not agree with him at the time.

But over the past few months, I have watched closely the two genders and I would say that I begin to see what he sees. There is so much emphasis and teachings being given to the females in respect to becoming better people and breaking free from societal norms but none of these teachings are given to the men. The society is supposed to be made of men and women. The society is not a thing that can be touched or felt. The society is you and I. So if we say that we are fighting for feminism, gender equality, isn’t it right that we also educate the men on why and how they are meant to act and behave in an ideal society?

There is gross imbalance with the way these teachings go. A woman on Twitter pointed out recently that out of all the people who always approached her for help with investing in their businesses, only the women were most courteous, only the women approached you with a level of preparedness, the men on the other hand, behaved as though it were their right for her to give them money. Reading her thread of tweets, it hit me. We aren’t doing enough educating just women, men also need this education. Most Twitter users must have seen the hashtag #KeepTheChangeBae. Which was another case of the entitlement mentality played out by on of our very own never disappointing males.

When we keep mentioning the society is behind these ills, it makes the problem seem ambiguous as though correcting it would take a century. We need to identify the reason for this mindset which constantly undermines women in the society identify the perpetrators and attack the problem at its root by educating the persons involved….the men and a couple of women who have accepted the situation in a case of learned helplessness. Until then, the scramble for feminism would make no sense and would seem as though it is the hatred of men.


This article was written by Blessing Iyamadiken

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