Dating in your twenties, particularly in your early twenties, can be a labyrinth. You’re constantly trying to figure things out and find your way. It is especially difficult to find guidance in terms of navigating relationships in our society, where parents don’t want to hear that you’re dating until you bring home a wife or husband. Unless you have older siblings, cousins, aunties, and uncles with whom you feel comfortable sharing your feelings and who are willing to give you relationship advice, you usually end up figuring it out on your own or getting advice from friends who are usually just as clueless as you are.
I recall feeling lost and confused while dating in my early twenties. I made numerous mistakes and was constantly attempting to make things work with the wrong people. The fact that I was dealing with self-esteem issues at the time didn’t make navigating my relationships any easier. I know there are many others out there who, like me, are settling, giving more than they should, and trying to please because they don’t believe they deserve the attention their partners are giving them. Before I give my relationship advice to everyone, I want to tell these people, “You are more than enough.” You deserve love and not just any kind of love, but the right kind of love. You deserve to be loved and treated well, no matter how you look or what you’re going through. Stop allowing yourself to be taken advantage of. You must learn to love yourself more than anything else so that when someone isn’t loving you properly, you can step back from the situation because you love yourself too much to accept anything less than what you deserve.
I wish I had had someone give me all of the advice I’m about to share. It would have helped me set my priorities and boundaries straight. It would have also saved me time, energy, and tears. So, as you read, make sure to let the words sink in so you don’t forget. It’s also a good idea to bookmark this article for future reference.
- Don’t be so in love with someone that you ignore how horrible they’re treating you. This is why self-love is important, as I mentioned earlier. If you love yourself and regard yourself highly, it would be difficult for you to allow someone to treat you badly. You need to love yourself first before loving anyone else.
- If you are doing the best you can and giving your all, and your partner doesn’t appreciate you, you’re doing your best for the wrong person. We can all tell when we’re being unappreciated and taken for granted. If you’ve been in this situation with your partner for a while, it might be time to reevaluate the relationship.
- Stop wondering if your partner cares about you. If you have to ask, the answer is No. You should never have to worry or wonder if your partner cares about you. You should be able to tell from their actions or words of assurance. If there is an absence of either of these, then you have your answer.
- Nothing will hurt you more than chasing someone who doesn’t want to be caught. I have been in this situation before, and I can assure you that it only ends in hurt and disappointment. Save yourself the trouble and move on quickly from people who make it clear that they are not interested in you.
- Sometimes you need to accept the fact that they don’t love you the way you love them. At least once, you’ll find yourself in a relationship where you love your partner more than they love you. You have to ask yourself some tough questions: “Can I live with this forever?” and “Will I be okay with the amount of love I’m receiving?”. Most often, the answers are “No,” and then you have to move on.
- You deserve someone who is sure about you. When someone is sure about you, it shows. They happily define your relationship and do not claim that they don’t like labels. They show you off proudly and do more than just hang out with you at home. Their actions and words are reassuring and don’t leave you with mixed signals.
- If someone is giving you mixed signals, emotions, personalities, or intentions, that’s not right. Indecision is a decision. So you don’t need to wait for them to say it in words. Just walk away.
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