Many weeks back, we ran a piece, talking with five girls who had been ghosted by guys in the past.
Now we’ve interviewed several guys on the exact reason(s) why they stopped talking to a girl who was once a love interest.
There’s this girl I recently ghosted, let’s say her name is Kemi.
So Kemi and I have known each other for a few months, we’ve only met twice (in school). On this fateful friday evening, Kemi posted her picture on her status. I was wowed so I slid to her DM with sweet comments. She replied me sooner than expected, then I just tried my luck to push her to visit me, that night, after a few persuasions she agreed.
She got to my hostel and immediately sat comfortably on my bed, sooner than I expected.
One thing led to another we made out, she made the first move though.
A few days after the make out, Kemi sent me a dm telling me she wanted to see me that very day, I was confused but made sure I saw her that day. Then she started telling me she is single and how she doesn’t think we’ll be cool as just friends.
Then, she indirectly told me she mistakenly borrowed 1k from MTN, in my mind I was like “na who collect loan go pay am”.
When she didn’t see any positive reaction from me, she told me directly to pay the debt for her. I later paid it sha.
Then a few weeks later, she called me and told me she’s stranded in Ibadan, that she needs 5k urgently. I turned on my airplane mode immediately, the call cancelled. Little did I know I would see tons of messages on whatsapp by the time I turned on my data, I read all the messages and did not respond. When she noticed I was posting on my status, she called me via whatsapp, i declined. She sent more messages again on whatsapp, I ignored.
Few days later, I posted a few personal pictures. She commented on them, looking for a way to start a convo maybe. I didn’t reply to any of the comments till date. I guess that was the elastic limit of her ego.
Ghosting happens a lot. From my own angle, I’ve ghosted girls before both online and physically, I just try to avoid her calls, don’t reply to messages and all of that.
There was one that was very very clingy and I was getting tired already. At a point I just realized I had enough and I had to just ghost her by not picking her calls. I just don’t want anything to do with her. We had a thing some years back, almost had sex but didn’t like one particular thing about her body.
After that, she contacted me on Facebook, probably because she lost my digits. She was asking for my WhatsApp contact but nah, I didn’t want to do anything again with her. She left me no other option than to ghost.
Met this girl sometime ago, liked her, tried to woo her. Damilola, very nice at first. So I was like, let me be friendly and shoot my shot. First time I went to see her, I bought food as per the gentleman. So I started shooting shots, she kept curving, keeping me offside and saving my long range efforts.
For weeks, I kept attempting…She was always like “I don’t know what to say” and what started pissing me off was the fact that she was very demanding, one of the things that drove me away.
With time, I stopped calling and replying to her texts. I ghosted her completely for a week.
I moved on, then she started giving me attitudes. She was like I’m being selfish, that I’m one of her closest friends.
In summary, the ghosting worked and she stopped pestering me for stuff.
I’ve ghosted different girls based on different issues. The issues vary. The one I can remember that is of recent,
I saw this girl on Instagram, I entered her DM. After a while, we decided we were going to meet, physical meeting. When I met the girl, she was just telling me her different issues and she said the next person that wants to date her, though she’s a sexually active person but the relationship has to be a year or a year plus before sex can even happen.
Real quick, I’m not even there for a serious relationship now you’re now even telling me if we are going to be in a serious relationship, I have to stay celibate for a year. I ghosted her after our meeting that day. It’s as if she got the symptoms, she didn’t message me after that day. She still checks my stories, I still check hers. And she didn’t message me again because she already got the signal.
So I met this girl at an eatery in Ibadan, I was attracted to her crocs majorly cause it was rare. I approached her and we exchanged contacts.
Sade and I vibed well via chats, we could practically chat anytime anyday. This went on for about 3 weeks, then we went out together.
After the outing, the connection only became closer.
One fateful day, we were discussing via voice call, all of a sudden I heard a voice “shay Ridwan oko mi niyen, bami kii oo” meaning (is that Ridwan my son-in-law, help me greet him)
That was certainly her mum’s voice. It was surprising because I had never seen her mum before nor talked with her.
I immediately became uninterested in her, cause I was not ready for any form of commitment. I began to detach myself bit by bit until we became history.
There’s this girl I met, let’s call her Sharon. She’s everything you want in a woman, pure heart, kind hearted, patient, beautiful in and out. She’s very lovable.
We were close, talking virtually everyday. But she had made it clear that she was not ready for any relationship at that time, I agreed at first. But slowly, I started falling for her, she was my ideal woman.
Then I stylishly asked her if she’s changed her stance on having a relationship, she told me the same thing.
There was no point keeping the friendship because I was slowly falling for her, I just had to ghost for her for my personal peace.
Bro, so many ghosting stories but there was one that really pained this girl though it was not my fault entirely. We go to the same school but started noticing her after she shared one of my posts to her IG story.
So I thanked her and we started talking. We got close, she would tell me about her break ups and all and I would also advise her on some things. She was always telling me about guys that were toasting her.
So one time, I got really busy with work and I was late on deadlines. My mental health was on a low too because I was overthinking and you know imposter syndrome. So to fully activate work mode, I put on airplane mode and got to work. No distractions.
After a week, I got back online but this girl was having none of it. She was so angry that I didn’t call her or give her any update. I was wrong, I apologized that it was work but she was so pissed that I ghosted her. It wasn’t intentional though.
This article was written by Olabode Otolorin; connect on Instagram with him here